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March 10, 2010 @ 2:09 pm

Strange Horoscope

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I don’t read my horoscope very often, especially the ones that show up on just about every home page option list that only take the sun sign into account.  I mean, come on, every Gemini out there is not going to have the exact same kind of day.

But today, as I was revamping my MyYahoo page after not having used it in years (more about why I’m doing that now coming soon), I came across my horoscope for today:

Working with facts and figures has never been on your top-ten list of favorite things. You much prefer words, since words can create two things that just so happen to be on that list: humor and truth. Anyone who manages to provide you with a conversation that consists of either will be allowed to keep your company now, for as long as they like. Anyone who doesn’t will be shown the door — not directly, and certainly not rudely, but in very short order.

It strikes me as strange.  Not because what it says is untrue, because it actually is pretty accurate, although I wouldn’t show someone the door for trying to discuss facts and figures with me if it’s necessary; I do need to talk about things at work sometimes, and SS helps me plan my budget.  It just doesn’t sound like a “daily prediction” sort of horoscope, to me, like most daily horoscopes do.  And is this only for today, that I’m supposedly more likely to want to talk in words about humor and truth, or this week, or always?

What’s funny (in a “hmmm” sort of way, not in an LOL sort of way) is that today is the first day in a stretch of several that I’ve managed to feel somewhat close to human.  (It’s like being on the first step of the staircase that leads back to “normal”.)

I’ve been glutened three times (at least) in about two weeks, after going for a nice long stretch of no glutenings (long for me, anyway), and I’m in the beginning of my HHW (aka Hormone Hell Week), and my Fibro has been flaring again, probably aggravated by the gluten, which also aggravates the PMDD and can make HHW much harder, and the gluten most definitely aggravates the ADD and makes the medication seem like nothing but a sugar pill.  So I’ve been finding it very difficult (or downright impossible) to focus at work, and difficult to carry on a conversation, for the most part.  Physically, I’ve been all hurty and achy and bloaty and, well, just feeling icky and awful.

But possibly the most difficult of all is that my tendency to overwhelm has been in high gear, and I had reached a point in the last several days that I was pretty much unable to discuss the budget with SS.  Or anything that felt complicated, really.  I just couldn’t wrap my head around it, and the whole aspect of planning out the next several weeks was too much to bear.  All I could think was that I needed to go home and collapse in my bed, hidden from the world, and cower there until I could deal again.  (And eat, oh my God, the compulsive eating has been back again, and after I just recently posted about how I was actually losing weight.)  But I was able, here and there, to talk about lighter topics and . . . yep . . . humor.  I found myself laughing a few times, actually, and thought it was such an odd contrast to my melting down in so many other areas.  I guess there are times when we just “dial down” as my therapist says, and I think it’s such an apt phrase, and we do what we can.  And if all I have left that I can do is hide in bed and laugh occasionally at something that strikes me as funny, then that is what I do.  It’s better than not doing anything, right?

And geez, I hope I can avoid gluten long enough to bounce back from this in a short enough time so as not to have lost too much ground, both at work and in my personal life.


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